Often women feel their home is a reflection of who they are. I discovered it’s okay to tell some people, “I am too busy right now, thank you for asking me.” When we have healthy boundaries, we are able to give more of ourselves instead of being spread so thin and feeling miserable. Of course, I want to help others and chip in however, I realized when I agree to too many projects I later feel resentful. When I always say yes to everyone’s requests, I’m saying no to me and my family. Trying to be fair and equal can cause more problems than it helps.īe mindful of personal boundaries. If one child only has one weekly activity, he doesn’t need an extra one to even things out. Also, keep in mind activities do not need to be evenly spread between children. Wow, that is a lot to volunteer for!Ĭounsel together as a family and brainstorm what adjustments need to be made. ![]() “Supermom” has agreed to juggle 20+ activities per week, not including her own events. Imagine a mom with five children who each have three or more weekly activities (some occurring on multiple nights). If your children have more than two activities scheduled per week, contemplate which ones might be unnecessary. Instead, closely inspect your calendar for the next week. I’m not recommending removing all activities. ![]() This required that I thoughtfully consider all activities my children were involved in and scale them back to a reasonable amount. Since then I have discovered three important adjustments which allow more time for the things that matter most: my relationships.īe careful about over scheduling children. The result: I was miserable and so were my children. Appearing to be “Supermom” and keeping up my hectic schedule made me feel important and validated. ![]() In my crazed need to be “”Supermom”” (or in other words, “perfect mom”), I forgot what mattered most-my children.Īt the time I believed I was acting in my children’s best interest, when in fact I was subconsciously driven by selfish motives. You are good enough without it, and your children will be better off.”Īt the time, I failed to realize most of the stress and frustration was self-inflicted. I would tell her, “Damara dear, I know you want to be a good mom, but your red shiny cape has to go! Here’s a great idea: dig a hole in the backyard, toss it in, and cover it with dirt. How I wish I could have a heart-to-heart chat with my younger self. My life is spiraling out of control-all in the name of “”Supermom.” My children are on edge and bicker regularly. I grow more impatient, frustrated, and sometimes flat-out mean. If only my kids would listen and move quickly when we need to go,” I reason.Īnother month passes. Where will I cram in weekly laundry and grocery shopping? My head starts spinning. ![]() I also have an activity I need to plan and a Sunday lesson to think about. The next day shows swim lessons and a church meeting. I glance at tomorrow’s schedule: Cub Scouts and piano lessons. “Okay, eat something quickly, and then head off to bed,” I quickly order. Swimming makes me so hungry,” my ten-year-old moans. When we finally arrive home it is past their bedtime. “What is wrong with them? Why do they move so slowly when we need to leave?” “Don’t they know I am doing this for them?” I muse. “Where are your shoes? You need your shoes! Seriously, you know what to do! Go get your shoes!” I bark. “Come on, boys, we need to go! You’re going to be late to swim team!” I yell.
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